Abusive relationships aren’t love. That might seem obvious, but abusive, toxic people behave in convoluted, contradictory, and confusing ways. In toxic relationships, love isn’t as cut-and-dried as a neutral observer might expect it to be. For example, one might think that love, real love, doesn’t hurt. And it shouldn’t. Love should never hurt. Sometimes it does, though. Sometimes one partner in a relationship is toxic. The hurt is direct in the form of actions and words, and the hurt is indirect in the form of actions and words–actions and words that seem kind, caring, loving.